Recently I was awakened.
I was awakened by how short and unexpecting life can be. One minute you have everything, the next you can be snapped out of the moment and you’re back at square one.
I discovered that’s it’s so important not to take life too seriously and not to waste time if you are not enjoying yourself. It’s important to put your happiness first, whether it’s your career or it’s your lifestyle, relationships. You don’t want the last thing you do or the situation you are in to be a regretful memory. You want to be happy and happiness is easy to achieve if you just understand the simple equation, that is; you.
Put yourself first, your body, your state of mind, your future. What makes you happy and what can make your body feel happy in the same way. You can be happy, but if you’re treating your body badly, half of the equation is missing. It starts with you and if you don’t know how to respect yourself, then you’ve set yourself up for disaster.
I was working a job that seemed endless, many of my colleagues are probably arguing that I am still young and that I still have the ‘energy’, but what does that mean? No matter what age you are, the fact that you are tired is not down to age. You may be mentally tired which get’s taken out of your body or maybe your body is feeling tired and diminished from the health and vitamins it needs to feel awake and energised.
In my case, I realised I didn’t love what I was doing anymore or being in a high demanding kitchen. I loved making desserts and learning new things but I realised, doing the same thing every day was taking a turn on my life. Being at work more than being at home or being outside making adventures and learning about life, I was spending it in a kitchen, creating the same dishes day in and day out serving the same customers.
Don’t get me wrong, some people love to do this as a job, but I need a more fun, creative and challenging job. Also to be around people that are positive and helpful, not jealous and two faced. It’s not a good environment to be in.
One day, it just clicked. I was tired, I never wanted to go to work, when I was in work, I didn’t want to be there and was watching the clock hoping it was time to close and leave. I started getting back my panic attacks and getting nervous spells. I wasn’t aware that I was that unhappy but when I started noticing my symptoms I knew that I had to get out.
So over a long thinking period, I decided I needed to leave. So I did.
I took another job and started working at a bakery, yet I realised it wasn’t challenging enough and quit.
The point of that is, it’s not that I’ve become picky or lazy, it’s because I now don’t accept situations that I don’t want to be in. I find myself a happy place and know what I want. A job even that is less demanding and skilled but makes me happy is enough for me.
It’s important, of course to have money, not to be completely risking not paying rent or having enough money for food. Make sure you are secure and then find what you need, whether it’s another job, going back to learn and educate yourself, move countries, or find something that’s completely more challenging than you ever thought imaginable.